Turning 28 & 26 weeks.

B5E61953-ABD1-477E-85F1-E096D70D87F2.jpegI’m going to make this post short and sweet as it’s my birthday weekend and I’ve got loads on pluuuus it’s been an extra long day today as I’ve been awake since 5am 😩😩 Still struggling to sleep and now I have a bedtime routine of- bath, smother myself in Lush sleepy lotion, have a shot of gavisgon and then whack a bit of forehead stick on! Works throughout the working week but of course- doesn’t on the weekend!! Typical! So yes, slept shit, woke up exhausted, had a fast two hour spray tan done to make me feel more human so I could shower it off and head to my 4d scan appointment (which we were 15 minutes late for as Mark said we’d be fine to leave at a certain time which it clearly wasn’t 🙄😂) but luckily it was fine us running late! Baby was being a pain in the butt haha in fact, that was the first thing she was showing us!! She asked us if we knew the gender already so we’d said yes and she said, ‘Oh good as that’s her bits right there!’ 😂😂😂 We got an hour as well as two prints, a disk of all the photos and a dvd recording of it! ❤️❤️

(Please ignore my awful nails- I’ve just had them redone lol!! They just won’t stop growing!!)

Little bugger though! She was playing with the umbilical cord and had that over her face as well as both of her hands! I had to cough, wiggle, go for a ten minute walk and drink something as well as wee to try and get her to play…She’s either a stubborn sod like her mother or fidgety as hell like her father! When we did finally get to see her little face though, we saw her chewing her hand, yawning and best of all….She smiled at us ❤️ So cute!!! Wow the amount of bubbles she was blowing too! No wonder I’ve been farting loads! So then we’ve been for something to eat, I saw my bestie whilst having my nails done and only just got back home…I’m knackered!!!! Getting so tired now, going out for the day takes it right out of me and tomorrow is my actual birthday and I’m out all day for that! I need to buy some holiday clothes for my hen do and we are also going to go to a cat cafe!!! Everyone knows how much I love my kitties!!! Find it crazy though that we’ve paid £24 for an hour with cats….when we have two! 😂😂

I have mainly been given cash for my birthday but I’ve been bought a bath board with loads of bath products, new towels and best of all….. a pregnancy massage gift voucher!! So cannot wait to book in and have that done!!! Anyway I’m going to have a little chill as I’ve literally been running about all day! I promise I will write a bit more next week!

Advertisements

I’m oh so tired…..

56E479BE-F561-4508-8E18-944F52C1C19A.pngLiterally writing this at 06:26am…. slept absolutely shite last night! Can’t remember when I actually went sleep at- think it was 11pm- woke up at 01:26am with the WORST acid reflux ever!! I then was sat up half asleep when I threw up in my hands so had to get up and sort myself out, then I sat back down on the bed, munched on gavisgon tablets and went back off but my sciatica is just being a shit, twat, knob!! So that’s why I’m awake again! 👍🏻 Today should be interesting!

This week has been another weird one! Had a midwife checkup on Monday which was fine but I was given the fabulous whooping cough jab which wasn’t bad at all…..until later in the day when it gave me a dead arm. 🙄 I managed to shake some of last weeks stress off which felt like a weight lifted but then… Mark received a shit phone call. Basically Mark had to go in for an ECG to check his heart which we went to and were told everything was fine- this was months ago! He then received a phone call a couple of weeks after mentioning about going in for another check up and that an appointment letter would come through the door. We’d not had anything through for weeks and weeks so I nagged him to chase it up. He rang his own doctors who said they didn’t know anything about it, so then he rang the place he went to have his ECG done at and they didn’t know- said they must have made a duplicate appointment…..He went to do the school run and he came back extremely upset because they had rang him to say he had to go for an emergency heart scan as they had found dark spots….So I’m trying to comfort him but I was so annoyed at how bad he’s been treated!!! How can you tell someone news like that over the phone!!!!!! So yesterday morning, he went for this scan- I had to stay home due to work so I was sat here waiting and trying to stay calm until he rang me. Low and behold- nothing wrong with his heart! The reason he had an ‘emergency scan’ was because he’d not received his appointment within a six week time frame and the dark spots were a ‘technical issue’….All I cared about was the fact he was ok as he’s been scared about this pretty much since I’ve been pregnant! But again, another failure by my favourite hospital! 🙄😂 It was even on the BBC news the other day (yet again) as the 2nd worst performing! This is why I refuse to ever go back! I know it’s not all the staffs fault! I know amazing people who work there but I also know some shitters who work there lol and I go off my own experiences! Trust me, there’s been four very bad times I’ve been mistreated there but my laparoscopy there last year topped it!

Good thing about this week though- the weather! I’m lucky enough to be in my garden all day when it’s lovely! Everyone was warning me that I’d probably struggle in this weather but quite the opposite!!!! I love sunny and warm weather! Don’t get me wrong- this time last year I was in Thailand and it was between 37°- 42° everyday and I struggled then a few times!! Not when it’s like 20° in Britain lol! I’ve got nice clothes I can wear and my mood is uplifted! However, I feel like a right hot head at the moment!! Things that don’t normally bother me, really are doing so! Plus I can’t help snapping at people! Apologies but my life has always been complicated and crazy to say the least without pregnancy added to it! 😂😂 She has been a bugger too! She kicked me that hard the other night- I jumped out of my fucking skin! Mark wet himself, (not literally as that’s my job! Haven’t done however wooooo…) laughing at me! Tight git!

I can now feel tiredness kicking back in so I’m going to disturb Mark, who hasn’t moved once at all the whole night, so I can lie on his chest to see if that can get me back off! Til next week biiiitcccheeesss…..🤪

Whatever Trevor.

D0FDD85D-2F8C-4F10-A706-EDF0B01A1ED8.jpegI’m just going to go all out on this blog considering the whole world is going absolutely out of its mind……..

This week I have not been happy. Not because of the pregnancy, but because I’m just so sick of bullshit. Everyday on social media I see ‘celebrities’ promoting bullshit fads- makeup, diets- including slimming injections!!!!!! Etc- and I read some of the comments and I see how many people get sucked in by all this and worst part is: believe it!!!!!!! I won’t go on about who, what and all that hoo-hah as people will always believe what they want and it’s not for me to judge or push what I think on to others….but at the moment, I’m distancing myself from it. I’ve started unfollowing people that just don’t interest me whether it’s just these so called ‘celebrities’, boring shit, or just negative media pages. I love Lady Gaga, cats, interior design, weddings, funny or uplifting videos and REAL people. That’s what I want to see more of! Since doing so- I feel so much better! It’s so easy to get sucked into social media and what everyone else is doing that it can make you doubt yourself and no one-especially a website should make you do that.

As well as having a social media clear out- I’m having personal clear outs too. I’ve had people not speak to me, including family I might add, when I got engaged last year. 🙄 I mean, how fucking sad and pathetic. But what really has got my fucking blood boiling is the fact I’ve had people ignoring me because I’m pregnant. Majority of my friends have been awesome but some haven’t even bothered with me for months. I read another pregnant ladies rant somewhere the other day that hit the fucking nail on the head. It said ‘If you don’t bother with me whilst I’m pregnant, then don’t dare show up once the baby is here pretending to be it’s auntie!’ So. Dam. True. I mean why ignore someone because they are having a fucking baby?! I mean it can only be jealousy but I don’t get how you can be jealous of a fucking baby?!?!?!?!?! BULLSHIT. The worst thing I think in this world is jealousy. My mum used to say to me and still does now, ‘Everyone loves you when you have nothing, but as soon as you become something or you get something, you receive criticism and hate. People can’t bear the thought of someone else being happy when they aren’t’ and you know what it’s true! Now I have everything I never thought I’d have- fiancé who is the love of my life, baby on the way, own our first house AND business and where are they?! I don’t fucking honestly get how you can’t be happy for someone else?! I’ve had a right shit life and now it’s my time to be happy! I can honestly say I’ve never been jealous of anyone! There’s people I wished I looked like or times I’ve wished to be as rich as someone else but I’ve learnt that unless I’ve got millions in the bank- I’m stuck with my ugly mug and to earn millions- I need to work hard! I do work fucking hard! I work 11 hours a day, with no breaks, 5 days a week. In the next few years I’m hoping I can expand on this and have new goals set! I want better for myself and my family and that’s what people should just get on with- their own dam life! Stay out of mine!!!!! I’m happy being in my own little bubble but if you try and pop it- shit is going down. So that’s cool with me, if you want to be a shit person who is jealous, fake, bitter and miserable, I’d rather know now so I can cut you out of my life entirely before my beautiful baby girl is born so she doesn’t have to ever be exposed to being around toxic bitches, she will have enough of them to deal with herself as she gets older but she will be taught well. She will also get told the same thing, ‘Treat everyone how you want to be treated and if someone treats you like shit, get rid!’ Honestly! If you think this rant is about you then it obviously is. Don’t bother trying to message me to see if I’m ok because quite honestly, I’m absolutely fine! It’s you that needs help! 👍🏻🖕🏼Not even bothered that plans have been made with people as plans can easily be changed! I’m beyond giving a shit. It’s bad enough no efforts been made about our wedding and pre-wedding plans but not to bother with my baby…..Rant over- that’s the only time I’m giving these people as my time is much more precious.

Apart from usual aches, acid reflux and all the bullshit etc I’m all good! Me and Mark went swimming to see if that helped me in anyway but HA did it fuck! All that happened was my acid reflux got bad and then I felt sick for about an hour afterwards until I then eventually threw up and had to ate two gavisgon tablets. Don’t know what I’m supposed to do apart from ride it out until she’s here! Trust me to have a shit pregnancy 😂😂. We’ve been trying to keep ourselves busy and do fun things together like meals out, shopping and cinema- we’ve also gone through all our old pictures together as Mark wants to make us a video montage for the wedding and we’ve been looking at all the new stuff and things we can do whilst we are out there! We’ve also got some stuffed booked to do for my birthday in a couple of weeks. Cannot wait! So many good things to come so I’m not letting anyone or anything spoil it!

That felt good. Off to eat chocolate now! Til next week folks!

Getting on my nerves….literally!!!

5E653F7F-10E6-458A-8D7B-D71F097D68CCUrgh what a week this pile of shit has been and it should have been great! Always the way! Firstly I had an antenatal appointment at St Mary’s on bank holiday Monday at bloody 9am!!!! We got there and had to wait 30 mins to literally have a 5 minute appointment- just to see how me and my asthma are doing which ironically is the only thing I’ve not suffered with apart from when I had that chest infection! We got to listen to her heartbeat however and I got my maternity certificate so I can claim maternity allowance. But 9am!!!! I had like 3 hours sleep the night before- other than that I have been sleeping great again! But that night I had a few stupid dreams again and the whole, ‘I’m hot’ followed by ‘I’m cold’ the second I put half my body out of the sheets! It was my mums birthday on Monday too so I spent the morning with her whilst mark went to the gym then came home but it’s safe to say I spent all of Monday in a mood and was exhausted! Also had a banging migraine! Awful! The next day then we had a trip to the zoo with the kids we work with and that killed me off completely! I was fine walking round then we sat down for lunch about 11:30am but after about an hour after that- I was just in agony!!!! I kept having to sit down because my back and legs were aching so much! When we got back- I just had to go and chill because I was fucked! Then Sod’s law happened! I decided to run a bath and give myself a bit of a pamper, Mark had gone to get something done to his car- told me he’d be back by 8pm in which I had a food shop being delivered between 8-9pm so he’d be back. The second however I got in the bath, the door knocked. So I had to jump out, throw mark’s jumper on and run down to get the shop! Fucking milk had leaked everywhere as there was a hole in the bottom….honest to to god, you couldn’t write it better! My life would make a good tv series! 😂😂 I didn’t even bother to sort it out so I just went and got back in the bath then shock horror, Mark walked through the door! 🤦🏼‍♀️ Luckily he’d put it all away for me so at least I didn’t have to do that!

Oh and also- not only are my migraines back- but so is my sickness! Wooooo! Day after the zoo I knew I’d be achy but actually I wasn’t, the only thing that was bad was the sciatica in my left hip! I struggled getting downstairs! I got Mark to rub it as best as he could and tried to do normal bits like paperwork and washing- but I’m even struggling bending down now- mixture of bump size and pain! At lunch I lay on the couch watching telly and sat up to get my drink when I just vomited, luckily, all over the floor. Bless Mark as he cleaned it up and told me to go and chill out in bed. He hates seeing me like this because he knows I’m normally tough as old boots but honestly this pregnancy is draining me!!! 18 weeks of pure solid illness. (first 6 like I said- didn’t have a scooby) I know every woman is different- i was getting my nails done the other day and I had women telling me they were only sick once or they were fine, felt great- even others saying their favourite times were between 23-31 weeks but I’m 23 weeks and suffering! I hate being sick too! I can’t even clean it! I clean piss and shit literally for a living- I can clean cat sick…well not when I’m pregnant lol and I can clean sick when it’s myself or Mark when it’s alcohol related but not when it’s ill sick. No way. My right hand is starting to swell slightly too and I keep getting pins and needles in it to! 😩 Honestly left side of my body sciatica, right side a dead arm and pins and needles! She’s in the middle kicking around absolutely bloody fine- feels like she’s having the time of her life! 😂😂 I can’t even walk around Tesco without walking the speed of a snail! I’ve still fucking got 3 months left!!!!!

I’m determined to have a good weekend this weekend because I need perking up!!! I’m looking at spa days for pregnant women so I can have a pamper and more importantly a good massage! If anyone can recommend one for me then please let me know!!!

Nothing like a good old moan!

4E305036-4900-4E47-A41C-3D099DCBA2C4.jpeg

This week has just been annoying if I’m totally honest! I’m fed up, I’m bored, I feel sooooo fat- (I know for the hundredth time I am not) but I’m sorry- I’ve always been a size 8 (UK size) never been any bigger but I’m buying clothes in bigger sizes and even they are getting too small! Problem is however, is that because I’ve not gained weight anywhere else except for my bump- it’s making it almost impossible to shop clothes!!!! I can’t actually freakin’ wait til summer so I can just wear boho jumpsuits and baggy dresses that definitely fit!!! Now I’m getting bigger too- my back is hurting more, sciatica is getting worse and now- I can’t stop bastard itching!!!!! I feel like I’ve got pissing fleas!!!!! I bought some E45 intense recovery and that has definitely helped but oh my god it’s been horrible!!!! My skin is starting to go shite again- just really dry and flaking, especially on my face! Thank god I’ve had another Dermaplanning facial!! When I last had that in January, I’ve had no spots or anything but they are slowly creeping back on my chin now! Oh and I keep getting pins and needles but only in my right hand and up my arm at night. 😩 Acid reflux is also a real bitch!  I’m really just fed up this week! Roll on labour 😂😂 I used to be terrified at the thought of it- honestly I really was! But I seriously can’t wait because then I know it’s finally done with!!!!!!! I already love my daughter more than anything and I cannot wait to have her in my arms but I honestly can’t say how glad I will be when this is all over!!! I’ve said it before but seriously- it is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. Mentally, physically and emotionally draining!! Mentally I’m finding it really difficult as well because I can’t fucking remember anything!!! People will try and have conversations with me and I either don’t even listen like I’m away with the fairies or I just can’t remember what I’m even talking about haha!!! Just bare with me!

Part of me does however, feel like I’ve only been pregnant 5 minutes but then I also feel like I’ve been pregnant forever!!! I feel like it’s been a bit of a blur since finding out in December, especially as we had a lot going on at the same time, I can’t believe I’m already over halfway through but then when I think about it, I’ll have been pregnant over Christmas, Easter, my birthday, through snow, spring and summer- even Marks birthday in June…. and that feels like bloody forever!!! Everyone is already asking me what I want for my birthday and what I’m doing for it but I honestly don’t know!!! I don’t see the point in looking at stuff for me as I mentioned- clothes for me at the moment are pointless and I have everything that I need- I just want things for her!!!! I can’t say I don’t care about myself and my appearance as I do and I always will do, (just not at the moment whilst I’m pregnant haha) but she’s already far more important than anything else and I’d rather her have everything!! Il treat myself to stuff when I’m not the size of a detached house!

All week I have just been feeling her kicking me and swishing about as well! Especially when I have music on or I’m singing away…probably telling me to shut up haha! The others time are first thing in the morning and then throughout the night of course too! Maybe it’s the beverages and karaoking til 6am before I knew I was pregnant that’s made her a party animal! 😂😂 Mark always asks me if he can have a feel and it makes me laugh! If anyone has the right to just come over and touch my belly it’s him!!! When she’s really giving it some I quickly grab his hand and place it where I can feel her haha! My mums not bloody shy! She just waltzes in and puts her hand on my belly before even saying ‘Hi’ 😂😂 It’s weird when you first feel your baby move! I thought it was just gas at first- I’m farting bloody loads!!! Then on the 20 week scan, all we saw was her blowing loads of bubbles! You can even see her blowing one on the picture! No wonder I’m so gassy! Urgh and they bloody stink as well!!! Sometimes they come in handy though as I had some stupid cow in a shop barge right into me- I had a tight tshirt on so you know, it’s fucking obvious I’m pregnant! I was so annoyed that I wanted to flipping smack her one!!! She didn’t even acknowledge me! So what did I do…let the biggest, stinkiest fart ever slip on out! 😏 That made her keep away from me as far as possible! So lesson for everyone- annoy me and prepare to face a big of eternal stench hahahaha! I have to admit/ I love feeling her kick me and move but I fucking HATE when she kicks my bladder!!! Goes through me!!!!! Especially because I don’t know whether I’m going to end up pissing myself haha!!!!

I suppose though- a positive to this weekend…it’s a long one and I’ve already got a stash of Easter eggs in along with cake mix! I can stuff myself til my heart (and bump’s) content!

It’s a…..

B8DA7B6D-4F28-4C61-A9E7-897FDC0078DA.jpeg

I can finally spill the beans….. It’s a GIRL!!!!!! Ok I’m not going to lie- I’ve known since the 4d scan when I was 16 weeks but I wanted to keep it quiet and double check at my 20 week scan! I’ve had to re-check all my blogs to make sure I didn’t slip up anywhere by saying ‘she’ haha! So now it’s out of the bag and no more secrets! What a relief!!! I did slip up to a few people so thankyou guys for keeping it quiet for me!!! I’m not going to lie but a couple of my friends wanted me to have a gender reveal party and I said I’d do it- reluctantly. The more I thought about it, I didn’t fancy it. I’m so glad now that I didn’t because when the lady told me it was a girl at first, I cried. The only reason being was like I’ve mentioned in a previous post about things happening to me and the thought of having a daughter would terrify me incase any of what I’ve experienced, she does too….imagine people seeing that on video and seeing that as my first reaction! I’d have been mortified because no one would have understood why I cried until now I’ve wrote this!!! It’s nothing to do with ‘gender disappointment’ believe me! Now it’s sunk in I can’t bloody wait to have a girl and I don’t think I could see myself with a boy now!! Back to a gender reveal party though….a friend mentioned about everyone getting ‘Lit’ and I thought, ‘Oh yeah great!’ Sorry but what am I, or my baby going to get out of a gender reveal party?! Everyone having a drink and a great time finding out what I’m having, whilst I’m hormonal and crying! Plus all a gender reveal is for really is for social media!! I’m not interested in likes or followers! I’m surprised by how many people have liked and followed me over the years!! I’d rather people like and read my blogs and appreciate me for my mind and my personality than for anything else! Obviously though, I had told my friend she could throw me one but that didn’t go to plan anyway!! Mark was dying to know more than me what we were having which is why we had that scan booked if I’m honest! I think now it was the best thing we could have done and maybe we can think about a baby shower instead. At least then everyone knows she’s a girl and we can have a catch up with good friends, a few drinks, (non alcoholic for me obvs) nibbles, treats and if anyone wanted to buy her something, they can do as they know it’s going to be a girl!!! I admit I’ve done all this now and I’ll piss myself if it turns out to be a boy! 😂😂 What a head fuck that will be!

Now I’ve had time to sink in, I’m no longer scared about a girl- I’m just going to make dam sure she can look after herself and I will be making sure that she can come to me at any time with anything as I have her back! I’ve hid a lot of things from people and that certainly won’t be the case for her! I’ll be a true lioness protecting her and when needed- her daddy can go fuck shit up! 😂😂😂 I’ll be a proper psycho mum I tell you!!! I’ve already bought her loads of cool clothes- her wardrobe is already better than mine!!! I can’t wait to hit the shops when I’m back to normal though- I’ve only bought myself baggy/comfy shit to last me whilst I’m pregnant and I don’t care if I look like shit because most of the time- I feel it anyway!! No ones hardly rude about a pregnant woman anyway and if they are then they are a ****!! But I definitely can’t wait until I feel myself again and can buy nice summer clothes for my honeymoon!! Oh and before anyone asks me, we do have a few names we like but we won’t be telling anyone them! Every time I’ve mentioned one I like- someone doesn’t or tries to put me off!! I couldn’t give a shit what anyone thinks to be honest! If I wanted to call her Gaga then I would!! (I’m not lol- Mark wouldn’t let me anyway!) So that’s the end of that debate haha!!! So ask me and I won’t tell you anyway! Il tell you something completely opposite to what we are thinking! I didn’t tell you what to call your kids or judge you so…… 🖕🏼🖕🏼

Quite a lot is happening every week to since being pregnant!! A lot of downs for now some ups, thank god!!! Firstly our luck is massively changing- We both had a tax rebate through, my compensation offer and we won £100 on a horse on the Cheltenham races! My best friend told us to give it a go so we thought, sod it why not! Mark ended up picking the same horse as her and it bloody won! As we were watching the race however…I was laughing so hard at Mark getting over excited and shouting at the telly that I actually wee’d myself!!!!!!!! Clearly haven’t been doing enough pelvic floor exercises! 😂😂 Imagine if I was further into my pregnancy and that’s how my waters broke?!?! That would have made a good story!! 😂😂 Seriously though, even a sneeze and a bit of wee will leak out!!!Must just have a weak bladder lol! Health wise I’m ok apart from back ache, sciatica and acid reflux- it’s brutal!! But not much I can do an about it so just plodding through! I’m eating like no tomorrow but no cravings! Just eating normal things! Oh and I’m sure Mark is suffering with pregnancy symptoms also!! We even googled it and apparently it’s a thing lol!! So guess we are both pregnant!!!

I had some awful dreams too but the worst one was last week! I woke up at 05:20am in absolute tears because I had a dream that Dora (my cat) had died!!! She’s not just a cat, she’s my best friend! Literally my baby!!!!! When I first got her- I was diagnosed with bipolar and chronic depression. I’d attempted suicide because I was so lonely. At the time, I didn’t work- I just went out drinking every night or had ‘friends’ over just for company. I was stuck in 24/7 in a flat, on my own and was absolutely miserable! I’ve always had cats around me so after my stint, I told my mum I was getting a cat and didn’t tell my landlord as he didn’t want me to have pets in there! 🙈 I had a hamster I rescued before this but she had just died which again- made me more depressed. So I went out with my mum browsing cats. As I lived in a flat above a shop on quite a busy road and car park behind- it meant I could only really get a house cat. I went round a few places and the only house cats they had had some medical condition, really old (which i couldn’t of handled on top of everything if they had died) or they were like bloody feral- mega fiesty! I just wanted to give up but my nana suggested a place that me and my mum hadn’t thought of, so off we all went. It was such a beautiful place for rescued animals- big barns with sofas in, cats were just roaming everywhere! It was so cosy and homely, the problem was I didn’t know if they had any house cats! So we asked the lady and she said, ‘Oh I don’t think so but I will go and check…’ Instantly I could feel myself getting upset as I knew it was going to be a no but she came back and said, ‘We do have one who hates other cats and hasn’t shown any interest to being outside, would you like to see her?’ Of course I bit her hand off! So we walked through the barns to an area at the back which had cages and there was my little Dora. Well as soon as she opened the cage, Dora flew at me!! She was licking my face, sitting on my knee meowing at me….that was it! I knew she was mine that moment. We’ve literally been inseparable since! She loved cuddles but not being overly fussed, hated her belly being touched and used to cry when I had to leave her alone, she was just like me but a cat version!!! In fact, she just is me if I was a cat lol! When I first met Mark, she hated him! Used to hiss at him and lie in between us in bed and if he went to put his arm round me, she’d attack him!! Now of course she loves him haha! So as you can see, she’s so much more than ‘a cat’ to me! She got me through a horrible stage of my life and has been a rock since! Pets are definitely family! So my dream…..Basically it was Mark going downstairs in the morning before me and shouting me to come down ASAP so I ran down and he had hold of her and said, ‘I’m so sorry babe but Dora’s died’, I thought he was having me on but then I realised that he had hold of her and there is noooo way she will let you pick her up! I grabbed her off him and cradled her absolutely fucking heartbroken!!! So I woke up in absolute tears, grabbed my phone to see what time it was, realised it was 05:20am and ran to go and find her and I see her lay down at the top of the stairs so I just burst into tears as I thought she had gone! I had my torch on my phone to check I had the right cat, 😂😂 (her and Diego look the same sometimes lol) anyway she looked at me and made a ‘brrr’ noise as if to say, ‘What the hell are you doing?!’ I sat there in tears for about 10 minutes just stroking her, absolutely relieved that she was fine so I went back to bed but I couldn’t stop crying!!!! Mark woke up like ‘What’s up?? Are you ok?!’ So I told him what happened whilst so he held me and stroked my hair until I drifted back off! Safe to say that Dora had lots of attention and cuddles all day off me!!! I’ve even cried writing this down!!! I just cannot bare the thought of anything happening to her!!!

So other than pissing my pants, feeling like my back is about break, coping with being pregnant and dealing with a pregnant fiancé (🙄😂) haha, Oh and having shit dreams…..We are having a girl and over the moon 💕💕

 

Halfway….20 weeks!!!

EB55A5BE-5D1F-450F-9523-B831EA30328B.jpegTo symbolise 20 weeks, I thought I’d mention the 20 things that have got me through this pregnancy so far!! I saw something similar on another blog and thought it was a good idea so I thought I’d share with you all what I’ve been doing to somewhat- cope!

1. Lush sleepy lotion- infact anything from Lush! But this lotion is the only thing that actually helps me get some shut eye!!! It smells beautiful and I’ll definitely be including it in my baby’s bedtime routine!

2. Bio oil- Luckily I’m just all bump! It’s just my belly and boobs which have ballooned lol which is fine by me but because it will be my wedding when my little one reaches around 5 months old! I want to be looking/feeling my best so I’ve been using this religiously to try and eliminate any stretch marks/cellulite! Fortunately I haven’t any so far!!

3. 4head stick- because of my migraines and you can only take paracetamol 🙄 this actually really helps!! Also of course, sitting in a dark room and paracetamol- obviously!

4. Orange Rennie’s- I can’t stand gaviscon because of the mint (it’s like eating or drinking chalk 🤢) but I also can’t stand acidic reflux or heartburn so these are bloody perfect!

5. Innocent orange juice- at first it was fizzy drinks but that just made me fart/burp loads- any other OJ is not OK as it’s too bitter!

6. Epsom bath salts- ok so they have not helped on the constipation front nor have they helped my haemorrhoids but they have helped slightly with my back ache!! It’s been worth doing!

7. Pregnancy pillow- holy shit that Baymax has been amazing! Sooooo comfy!

8. Forever living heat lotion- because you can’t use deep heat or anything because they contain anti-inflammatories but with some research- this is safe through pregnancy! I have only used it on my neck when I’ve slept funny on it which then, I’ve worked out causes my migraines! Not anymore- thanks to this stuff!!!

9. Alcohol free prosecco- only the one from Sainsbury’s- £2.75 a bottle! Just for one of those days or when your socialising with friends who are drinking! At least you feel a little involved! Even if it is only psychological!! To be fair, the alcohol free Kopperburg is also decent!!

10. Marks joggers- the bigger the better!!! I don’t care that I look homeless! Because trust me- I really do! Selfies can be misleading lol!

11. Boohoo maternity range- for when I don’t want to feel homeless 🤪 trust me I’ve browsed loads of shops but this has some nice tops and night out dresses!

12. H&M maternity leggings- great quality, affordable and bloody comfy!!

13. Tea tree oil- for those pesky hormonal spots!

14. My iPhone- how else would I be able to keep a tab on my whole experience! I’m so glad I decided to write everything down that’s happening to me and my body! I know one day I’m going to look back and laugh!

15. Hot water bottle/ deep freeze patches- for any aches and pains!!! Definitely help and give some form of relief!

16. Beauty appointments- whether it’s a facial, wax, massage, nails or a blow dry, I think it’s important to try and make time for you and something that is going to make you feel good!!! Best thing I did was do something different to my hair, got a spray tan and had my makeup done!

17. Shopping- just getting out and looking/ buying things to get for my baby! Yes, I’m going to be poor! 👍🏻

18. A list on your phone of what you need to get- being organised helps with such a big thing! Plus when people ask you what you want them to get you, you can send them a copy of the list! Try and keep some things private- specific things what you like because people will put you off- IGNORE them! Get whatever you bloody well want!

19. Apps, games, blogs, pinterest, magazines, books etc because there are times where you feel alone and bored, so do things that will help distract you! Especially when you are poorly!

20. Family/ friends and for me, Mark- I’m so lucky to have the partner I do! This whole experience makes me love him even more than I already do! Yes he might have pissed me off at times so far lol and probably will continue til the end, but on the whole, he has been absolutely fantastic and I literally don’t know what I’d do without him! If you don’t have a partner and your doing it alone then buy a pet!! Seriously my little Dora cat has been a little doll with me! Not leaving my side and being extremely affectionate! Plus she doesn’t piss me off at all! 😂😂 (Just don’t lick them!)

Again, everyone is completely different, you might be feeling incredible etc but if you are struggling to cope with any of the problems I have mentioned- feel free to contact me and we can share tips!!!! 💕💕