Suckiness & soppiness


I cannot express how much I am looking forward to having my baby!!!! I can feel it kicking me and swishing about inside my belly!! We were quite sad excited parents actually lol, we found a baby heartbeat monitor online and bought it so every now and again, we can listen to it’s heartbeat! Whenever Mark talks to the baby, it really reacts to him and kicks the monitor haha! Then we just hear swishing and little bubbles lol! We (well I) have been buying tons of clothes and we have decorated the bedroom, (which was a nightmare) my poor Dad got to ours straight after work to do the wallpaper- I’ve picked a gorgeous rose gold one so I’ve gone for a rose gold and grey theme, and the wallpaper wouldn’t go on properly because the wall had lining paper underneath and was causing it to all bubble! So me and my dad got up early to strip the lining paper off and he put a couple of sheets up with Mark and Mark really wanted to get it finished (once we start something, we have to finish) so he did it all by himself and he’s never papered before. He’s done a bloody brilliant job!!! We’ve got a cot from Mark’s sister and I’ve bought blankets and a little basket and we’ve put up a blind and I just can’t stop opening the door to have a look!!!!! I’m actually jealous lol! Our bedroom used to be my favourite room in the house as I made it really calming and cosy but this has taken right over it!!!! I thought Mark wouldn’t have liked the rose gold but even he loves it! So proud of him!!

As excited as I am however, I’m so fed up of being pregnant! I’m on a bit of a downer about myself at the moment. I feel fat, which I know I’m not, I’m growing a human being for god sake! But I’ve always been a size 6/8 and I’m wearing marks XL joggers that bloody fit me 😂😂 I’ve only put weight on my belly so far but I’m just not used to this extra baggage on myself haha! My back hurts, haemorrhoids are driving me insane, sciatica is a swine- I just feel huge! I’m sick of people say no ‘Oh your only going to get bigger so get used to it’ 🖕🏼🖕🏼 Honestly- don’t some people say some daft shit to you!! So inconsiderate! You should never kick someone when they feel down but especially when your fucking pregnant!!!!! Treat others how you wish to be treated is one of my favourite mottos! I literally would never have the audacity to say half of what people say! It pisses me off! I honestly feel someone should write a book on things not to say to pregnant women! I also feel ugly- mainly because of how shit I feel, my skin just looks dull, I’m hating my hair….I just don’t feel like myself! I’m also not even bothering wearing makeup because I’m not going anywhere in particular and I’m mainly at home so I think that’s another thing knocking my confidence! So last weekend I decided to get a spray tan and had my makeup done and I felt fucking awesome! I took about a million selfies of myself lol just so when I do have these shit days, I can look at myself and see that I CAN look good whilst I’m pregnant! I even said to Mark last night that I can’t wait to get back to myself! At least I’m nearly halfway or could be if it decides to be early!!!

I also have to praise Mark right now! He’s been so good to me, as usual! But even more so at the moment! Like last year when I had my laparoscopy and I had a horrible recovery (mainly because I was given no aftercare and packed off with paracetamol even though I had morphine as I was in agony) I saw this on Facebook I’d wrote:


I’m so lucky to have found a man that I want to spend every single day with for the rest of my life, that will do literally anything for me and takes care of me! He’s going to be the best husband and father ever!!!!! Thanks again plenty of fish 🤪 haha!! Whilst being pregnant, he’s been supportive throughout, holding me whilst I cry, rubbing my hips where sciatica is killing me, nipping shop to get things for me….he even messaged my friends behind my back to organise a night in for us to cheer me up!!! He got me alcohol free prosecco, (Sainsbury’s one is the best) whilst he got her a normal bottle and got us both a takeaway! He’s just the utter best! This has just made us even stronger than ever ❤️❤️

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