Excuse the hormones!

B013AE43-45B9-486E-AA33-D81646EE5A65I moaned in my last blog about how much I’m hating being pregnant….. Well that backfired as it’s like my body is saying, ‘HA, as if!’ It’s about to get a whole lot worse……..

So starting with yesterday: I woke up with not a sore throat, but (my fellow tonsillitis sufferers will get this most) a really dry, rough throat and it felt like something was stuck in the back of my mouth! So I go to the mirror and use my trusty iPhone 7 Plus flashlight to see what the heck it was… well something I’ve never fucking seen but something that looked like a cauliflower but the size of a pea, stuck in a flab of skin at the back of my throat! Gross hey! So I managed to get it out and thought, ‘What the fucking hell was that?!’ So I go on trusted google and it’s a fucking tonsil stone! Never fucking heard of them (I had to rely on google lol but it definitely was)!!! So I then googled ‘tonsil stones in pregnancy’ and yup it’s a thing that of course I would get! Because your pregnant, your body produces more mucus (lovely) which can obviously lead to more bacteria and probably because I’m using kids toothpaste still and I’m throwing up a bit more…… it’s just safe to say that my oral hygiene isn’t as amazing as usual and I could end up suffering with the bastard things the entire time I’m pregnant but OH- they can be a life long thing also! So guess that means- get baby out then hopefully try and get my tonsils out!!!!! I’ve wanted them out for a few years now but they won’t just do it when your an adult due to higher complications. Suppose though after labour, il be a fucking soldier so I won’t care!! Not even had tonsillitis for about 2/3 years but at least it will mean I won’t suffer with it again! But seriously- do not google tonsil stones if you don’t need too. I know I’ve not got the strongest stomach at the minute- but it’s seriously disgusting…you have been warned!

Another thing: MIGRAINES. Oh. My. God. I never get headaches apart from when I’m hungover and ever since having Botox, I’ve not even had that! Yet I’ve actually got one as I’m writing this, sat in the pitch black (I feel like I should have had a role in The Others, like I’ve actually developed an allergy to the light) with no sound what so ever and my phone on the lowest brightness setting. But fuck me, I fully sympathise now with people that suffer on a regular basis as it’s fucking horrendous!!!!!!!!!! One minute I’m absolutely fine, the next it’s like someone has smashed me round the back of my head with a baseball bat!!!! Worst thing is that you can only take paracetamol!!!!! Seriously. Paracetamol. Joke. I’m one of them people that if I’m in pain- il take anything I can to not be in pain! I’m a mard arse! Even though I actually have quite a good pain threshold! Seriously I can sit through injections and needles and not bat an eyelid 😂😂 But paracetamol with a migraine is shit so I’ve been trying to rub lavender oil all over my head as I thought- hmm essential oils, il give that a go! But all that’s happened with that is I just pissing stink of lavender and my hair looks like I’ve not washed it for a month because it looks that greasy as I have it all over my hair, oh and I still have a banging migraine 😂😂

Oh and my skin is dreadful!!! I took my hoodie off yesterday and noticed all my belly peeling!!!! All my fucking face, especially around my eyebrows and nose area, is really flaky (now my skin is quite dry anyway but this is a joke) and it doesn’t seem to matter what I do or use- nothing is shifting it!!! I’ve still got Orion’s Belt on my chin but I guess I’m just going to have to ride it out!!!! I’ve got a dermaplan facial booked at the end of the month so I’m hoping that it will help! I booked that in around Christmas as I think it looks amazing!! Plus I want glowing skin for my wedding! Honest to god though, I hope this gets easier as I feel really rough at the moment!!! Seriously I’m so glad that I work for myself from home as I can take time off when I want and don’t have to go out anywhere because I genuinely wouldn’t even know what to do if I had to leave mine and work the hours I do in an office or anything!!! Hats off to you all ladies!!!! Well apart from if your a happy, glowy pregnant lady: Fuck. You. Haha just kidding, I’m highly jealous!!!!! (I think all I’m saying is that I really want a spa day where I can get pampered and feel relaxed— hint hint Mark 🤪)

So now I’ve shared the news on social media- one of my close friends rung me to congratulate us and we were talking about being pregnant (as she also is) and laughing about all our symptoms and talking about cravings….and then I burst into fits of laughter as I remembered something that happened the other night 😂😂😂 ok so my cat Dora has been so affectionate with me, not leaving my side and sitting in my bump (the other cat, Diego, is letting me have little cuddles now and again but is mainly avoiding me lol) but I fell asleep on the sofa the other day and Dora came over and sat on my head, licking my forehead and hair so when I woke up, I felt really affectionate back and she was giving me a kiss and started licking my face when I just had the urge to lick her fur 😂😂😂😂😂😂 honestly I can say I’ve been surrounded by cats my whole life and I’m a crazy cat lady but I have never bloody licked one nor had the urge too! Safe to say I won’t do it again (or at least I don’t think I will) as I had to scrape my tongue to get rid of all the cat hair. Minging.

So if your not pulling out tonsil stones, getting horrible migraines or getting the urge to lick you cat- your winning at pregnancy and I highly envy you!!!!!

By the way- I’ve realised that all I’ve done is moan so far about being pregnant and I actually feel bad so in the next blog…. I will try and be more chirpy, however I can’t promise!

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